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A reflection by Melissa

We’ve been here since 10 am.

A day at Sari Bari is full. Full of work, laughter, stories, the radio in the background, tea time, problems to solve, jokes, the occasional spontaneous dance party, lunch break (followed by nap time), and sometimes conflict. (We’re like any other family – we’ve all got our own stuff…conflict at home, stress, personality conflicts, health issues, money worries, miscommunication). You never really know what a day at Sari Bari will hold – but it will always be full.

It’s 7pm. Everyone has packed up for the day. Blankets are folded and stored, needles, thread, scissors and the ever important needle threader are all safely tucked where they belong. Saris have been re-draped, lunch boxes gathered. The windows closed, lights, fans and radio all turned off. Closing time.

It’s been another long, full day – and we gather to close it together. We’re all off to our homes. There are family members to look after, housework to be done, meals to be eaten, friends to see.

But first we gather back together in the room where we started the day. I stand there joking with my sisters. Our work is done, we gather simply as family, and we close our day together.  I can’t shake the feeling that this is sacred space.

A Reflection by Brooke

(Katha is the Bengali word for a hand quilting saris)

In India, people are accustomed to sitting on the floor to cut vegetables, to play a few rounds of cards, to sell goods in a shop or in the market… when we started Sari Bari the ladies also preferred to work on the floor rather than at tables. The ladies lay out their blankets, scarves, and bags weighing them in place with multiple bricks. Preparing their thread and threading their needle, they lean over and begin a new row of stitching. As the stitch moves along the sari the ladies scoot along, sometimes in the familiar sit-squat pose of India, all the time leaning over to ensure a straight steady stitch.

I’ve started learning how to stitch. The Sari Bari staff made a 15 x 15 inch piece of fabric for me to learn on, and gave me the necessary tools to create a small katha piece. My lines were not straight. I started over. My stitching was uneven; I pulled the thread out several inches and re-threaded my needle for a second try. The stitching continued to be uneven. Rows continued to be crooked. I saw small waves forming in my stitching when I thought I was making a straight line. I told myself if I was persistent, I would improve. I sat there for a few hours stitching on my small katha. When I stood up to take tea, my back filled with pain. I looked down to observe my work: it looked awful.

Through this frustrating exercise, I understand in a new way what it might be like for women when they first come to work at Sari Bari. Learning a new skill of stitching can be frustrating and discouraging. It takes time, persistence, and patience. All of our friends at Sari Bari have had to faithfully nurture the skill that they now possess in order to produce beautiful products. It is through their hard work and desire for freedom that Sari Bari exists as it does today.

A reflection by Melissa

One of the things that is very life-giving to me is visiting the red-light area near our business. I know that seems strange. I don’t understand it myself – but when I sit in those rooms with our friends, something in me comes alive. And as I balance (often precariously) between darkness and hope, I am alive in ways that I’m not any other time.

A few weeks ago Beth and I went to visit a brothel that Beth had previously spent a lot of time in – but we hadn’t been in recently (and I’d never been in). While we were sitting there talking with Beth’s friends, and older woman came in and began to tell us her story. She told us of a life of abuse, and a lack of hope. It’s a story I’ve heard over and over – and at the same time it is unique. After all, this is not a book I’m reading, or a movie I’m watching. It’s not a documentary. There she is standing in front of me, telling me her story. And it’s a story that should never happen. It should never have to be told – but it did, and it does. And then she told us about her son, and her grandson – and how well they are doing. I just kept thinking about how horrible her life had been. I can’t comprehend the betrayal, abuse and despair she’s lived through. Simultaneously I could hear pride in voice that her son and grandson had very different lives than she did. And I just kept thinking how she provided for her family at great cost to herself. My heart broke that she’d lived through what she’d lived through, and it celebrated with her that her offspring had a different life (as much as it can with a near stranger).

And then I realized I “knew” this woman, or at least I knew about her.

She’s “that woman” who owns the brothel. It’s a dark brothel. There are young girls forced to work there. It’s not a nice place (and this is in comparison with other brothels, so that’s saying a lot!). She’s the woman that I blame. I judge. I have no compassion for. She’s the oppressor. She’s “the bad guy.” She’s who we’re “fighting against.”

But after hearing her story – none of those labels fit anymore. After hearing her story, it somehow makes a lot more sense why and how she makes the decisions she does today. It’s still wrong, and I still hate it, but it makes sense. She has been broken. She has been oppressed. She has been abused. She’s lived through more than most of us can conjure up in our worst nightmares. And while that doesn’t justify oppressing someone else, she needs freedom as much as the girls she “owns.” How beautiful would it be for her to find restoration and hope and freedom? Can you imagine?!

My heart is quick to judge (hopefully its becoming a little slower). How quickly I had written her off , seeing only the worst of her, and not her humanity.  I saved that grace for myself and those I deem “worthy.” If I’d known who I was talking with – I know I would have listened with different ears. But on that day, I received grace I didn’t deserve. I received the grace of hearing a story without the filter of my judgment.

I hadn’t seen her at work in a long time.

She’s still relatively new, so I was starting to worry that she might have quit.

I saw her on Thursday, gave her a hug and told her how happy I was to see her.

I told her that I was worried that maybe she had quit working at Sari Bari.

She looked at me and said, “Never. On the day I die I will leave this work.”

Freedom is taking root in her heart.

Breath-taking.

Beautiful.

A Reflection by Brooke Taylor

It takes a lot of courage to leave what is familiar and enter into unknown. It takes a lot of
courage to place your trust in anyone when you have been taken advantage of multiple
times in relationship with others. It takes a lot of courage to disregard what people say
about you and believe something different about yourself.

“I’ve been stitching these blankets for years,” I could imagine her saying. She rested her
left elbow on an old sari blanket as she wove her needle rhythmically through the layers
of sari. Today like most days she was working on a queen size blanket; the stitching and
nature of the work has become natural for her in her few years at Sari Bari.

It takes time to grow in skill and confidence when first learning to sew. Our friends we
work alongside at Sari Bari are massively courageous. All of them have developed new
skills coming to work at the business; some have taken positions of leadership within Sari
Bari due to their attentive skill.

These women are courageous because in coming to work at Sari Bari they have left a
lifestyle where they were told they had to stay. They were told that there is no place for
them in society, they have no value, they have nothing to offer; but they have chosen to
reject these lies and take back their life that was stolen from them. They have created
and are creating a new life for themselves. It is their own courage that has created their
freedom. This is why they are our heroes.

As spring heads into summer, we are delighted to celebrate the graduation of twelve ladies on May 3rd.  There are now over eighty women walking in freedom at Sari Bari!  Speaking of graduation, there are new Sari Bari items available for your favorite graduate (or whomever else you love) in an eBay auction as well as at saribari.com.  Don’t forget, the auction ends this Saturday! (See previous blogpost for details)

Check out the latest shipment at our website.  Our newest product, the baby changing mat, is sure to be a favorite.  In addition, original sari blankets, baby blankets, pillow covers, and table runners have been re-stocked.  Finally, there is one gorgeousfreedom quilt available now.

To keep up-to-date on Sari Bari news in between e-mails, join us on Facebook or follow us on Twitter .

Sari Bari wants to invite you to participate in its first ever auction.  Sari Bari is auctioning two unique king size blankets 92×108. Each blanket is made up of the parts of more than 20 saris.  Each section of the blanket is stitched with the corresponding thread color and each patch is artistically applied to bring out the beauty of the over all piece

These Special Auction King Size Bed blankets are artistic tapestries of color.  They have been specially designed for this auction and will not be available for sale on the Sari Bari website.  Our Sari Bari Artisans Laxmi and Pornima gave many extra hours to the stitching and detailing of these wonderfully large pieces of Art.  These blankets are symbols of restoration and hope for Pornima and Laxmi and through their labors the long-term vision for freedom through Sari Bari is pressed forward and the opportunity for the freedom of more women grows!

We hope you will celebrate with us the artistic nature of the work that we do at Sari Bari.  We are in the business freedom, of making the old new, bringing forth beauty and restoring wholeness to that which has been cast off.

The funds from the Auction will be used by Sari Bari toward the purchase of 2 new desktop computers, a printer/scanner,  a server and 2 sewing machines.  We hope that we will be able to raise all or part of the funds needed to purchase these items which are needed to expand our capacity and efficiency.

We hope you like the blankets and throw your hat into the ring for the first ever Sari Bari Auction!  The two blankets will vary slightly in patch placement and patch color but the photo’s give a clear representation of the blanket and color scheme.

Go to the following links to place your bids:

King Size Blanket #1

King Size Blanket #2

Sari Bari Auction King Size Blankets (Download the slide show for best viewing!)

A Reflection by Beth

Last week,  the woman who normally comes to clean the floors for the day at Sari Bari and make the morning and afternoon tea didn’t come to work.  I arrived, opening the office at 9, at ten minutes past, I realized I would be sweeping and mopping for the morning. Half way through I was drenched, as it’s now in the 100’s each day.  I was hot, sweaty, irritated.  But as the rest of our Sari Bari women showed up to work, each one rushed to find a cloth for mopping, bottles to fill with drinking water, the toilet scrubber was even fought over…and I passed one women smiling as she descended down the stairs disposing of a large bucket’s worth of yesterday’s trash…when I said to her, “you don’t have to do that” she shrugged me off, saying “ what is it to me, we’re all the same, I can do this work”…

And it was at that moment that I realized what great beauty exists in our midst at Sari Bari.  No work is too menial or dirty, they live it, they believe it.  They changed my perspective, by the simple act of helping me, picking up a rag and kneeling down beside me to get the necessary morning work done.  These women are my heroes and my sisters, teaching me and reminding me of the power of humility and service at it’s finest, even in my moments of irritation I continue to learn from these beautiful sisters in my midst.

We had a someone volunteering at Sari Bari for a month. She was a great help in some admin work – and a beautiful set of spare hands…willing to do whatever was asked of her. And while she didn’t speak any Bangla – she had such a beautiful spirit…she had lunch with the ladies every day – and slowly, despite the language barrier the ladies have embraced her.On her last day volunteering with us, I took her around to the different rooms and told the ladies that she was leaving – going back to America. and then I translated their good-byes, their requests that she come again, and that they’ll miss her. some of the ladies were really sad to see her go. There were tears. And as I watched my friends grieve over someone leaving – I was reminded of what a sacred trust it is to be invited into their lives. They have welcomed me into the Sari Bari family. They have opened their hearts to me. We laugh, and joke. We share lunch. I just kept thinking over and over what an honor it is to know the women at Sari Bari. It is humbling. To be known and loved – to be welcomed and embraced…for them to open their hearts to knowing me, and being known by me – it’s sacred. This beautiful treasure that has been entrusted to my care. A gift that I do not deserve. A trust that has value beyond words. In so many ways I can’t fully understand the gift that I have been given. The relationships at Sari Bari are sacred – that’s the only word that I can come up with that begins to do justice…